Narrator’s pov
–
“I wanna be a lesbian” Jerry said
“We don’t want you-” Luna laughed when Cytheria nudged her in the stomach
“What?” she giggled
“Don’t be fucking RUDE”
“Are you kidding me?” Luna laughed
“Okay so Fawn, what do you have to say about that?” Jerry asked
Fawn’s eyes went wide as she stared at Nathan, the blonde girl approached the curly hair girl with a smile on her face. Nathan cupped Fawn’s cheeks and pulled their faces together, devouring her lips. The audience screamed and clapped in appreciation of the two girls making up
“Well that was a twist of events, next up we have Vernon Slavic who says her girlfriend is sleeping around but she thinks the person her girlfriend is sleeping with, actually lives in their house” Jerry said, the audience erupted in ‘ooohs’
The four gay’s scattered off the stage and the body guards brought a new chair to the stage since the other was tossed out of the building.
The audience clapped as Vernon approached the stage, the short hair blonde smiled and waved before taking her seat on the chair
“So Vernon, tell us what’s going on?” Jerry asked
“Well Jerry, I have a girlfriend for five years now and we’ve been having the time of our lives, she still lives with her family but I come and visit everyday. When her parents aren’t home, we have tho most nasty, butt naked sex-” Vernon said
“YUUUHH GET INTO ITTT” Luna yelled from the audience, the audience joined and hyped her up with screams and cheers
“Sex and you don’t live under the same roof. Sounds like a perfect relationship to me, what’s really going on?” Jerry asked
“Well, Jerry. My girlfriend Dreama doesn’t lie-”
“THAT’S WHAT THEY ALL SAY” Luna yelled
“The SHADE of it all” Cytheria laughed
“So one day I came over to surprise her, brought roses and threw those petals from the driveway leading up to her room. Then when I opened the bedroom door, I saw a pair of boxers on the bed” Vernon said, the audience gasped dramatically
“Does she wear boxers?” Jerry asked
“NO, SHE DOES NOT JERRY”
“So what other evidence do you have that she’s sleeping around?” Jerry asked
“One day, we were cuddling and her phone came on. She doesn’t have a password on it so I checked her phone and saw messages from someone called ‘Big Bro’ and they were talking and using vibrators to spice up their sex life” Vernon said
“Wow, that must have been hard for you” Jerry said
“The person said my girlfriend’s clit was finger licking good!” Vernon cried
“So you think she’s having sex with a guy?” Jerry asked
“I think so Jerry, I really do think so”
“Alright well, let’s bring out Dreama. Everyone say hi to Dreama” Jerry announced, the audience erupted in boos as the petite girl entered the stage
Dreama’s hair looked messy, her face screamed fresh sex but she held a pout as she walked towards Vernon, ignoring the boos of the crowd
“Vernon, Vernon I’m so sorry” Dreama pleaded
“Who’s big bro? WHO’S BIG BRO!” Vernon yelled
“I don’t think you want to know” Dreama muttered
“You cheated on me Dreama, you CHEATED” Vernon yelled
“You have to understand, I love you. I’m sorry Vernon!” Dreama pleaded
“How many times” Vernon asked
“What?”
“HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU FUCK HIM” Vernon yelled
“I don’t know-”
“HOW MANY TIM-”
“5 times a day!” Dreama screamed, Vernon’s eyes went wide
“But we have sex 5 times a day!” Vernon yelled, the audience gasped
“Well shit, Dreama a freakkk” Luna laughed
“Somebody come get eerrrr” Cytheria yelled
“I usually throw some sleep medicine in your beer so you can fall asleep then he’d come into the kitchen to literally cum” Dreama said
“Who is this HE?!” Vernon yelled
“Do you ever think that big bro means big brother? Do you have a brother Dreama?” Jerry asked
“Yes I do”
“There’s no way it could be her bother” Vernon said
“Why not?” Jerry asked
“Because her brother is GAY. Like he’s the definition of GAY” Vernon hissed
“Let’s bring out the brother, everyone please welcome Cole” Jerry said, the audience stared the cheer as they awaited the arrival of Cole
“Hello mother fuckers!” Cole yelled out as she walked onto stage
The boy was wearing a tight red cocktail dress with black heels, his makeup looked baked for the gods and his hair was curly, the boy strutted towards the front of the stage and gave an over the shoulder look to the camera before blowing a kiss
“So this is Cole?” Jerry asked
“That’s my name, don’t ware it out babyboy” Cole winked at the older man
“Oh-‘ Jerry blushed
“Cole, I’m only gonna ask you this once. Are you having sex with your sister?” Vernon asked
“Oh my God, I can’t believe you’d even ask me such a question” Cole gasped dramatically
“DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH Dreama”
“Yes, yes I did” Cole smirked, the audience gasped dramatically and their eyes went wide
“I think I’m gonna throw up-” Vernon said in disgust
“I FUCKED her right next to you, she luhh this limped dick-”
“EWWW” Vernon screamed
“It’s true, I do love it” Dreama smirked, her hands ran all over Cole’s chest and the boy slapped Dreama’s ass, earning a loud moan from the girl
“Jerry, I’m about to beat this bitch up” Vernon yelled, a bell rang and Vernon ran towards the boy in the dress
“NO, NOT THE FACE” Cole squealed and pulled Dreama in front of him to block to punches
Vernon threw her hands towards the boy’s face, avoiding Dreama who squealed and ran away. Cole fell onto the ground screaming as Vernon continued to stomp on his gay ass. The security guards approached the stage and tried to pull the two away.
Vernon’s hands gripped onto Cole’s dress as she was carried away by the security guards, her grip was so strong that it ripped the dress into two pieces, exposing Cole’s Spongebob boxers-
“THAT WAS THE SAME BOXERS I FOUND ON THE BED JERRY” Vernon yelled
“Oh my god” Luna laughed loudly
“I love those Spongebob boxers, it makes his bulge looks big-” Dreama said
“Dreama shut the fuck up with your disgusting ass!” Vernon hissed
“Oh I’m disgusting? You don’t even wipe your ass when you take a shit!” Dreama yelled
“You still ate my ass though!” Vernon snapped back
“where is Lucifer when you need him?” Cytheria laughed to herself
“I ate Cole’s ass right before yours and guess what? His was delicious!” Dreama said
“she loves when I slap my balls all over her face” Cole smirked
“I’m gonna kill you!” Vernon hissed and charged towards Cole, the boy squealed and hopped off the stage, running to the audience
The crowd screamed when Cole ran past them, his long legs worked fast despite wearing heels. The boy scampered through the seats of the audience, Vernon trailed right behind him, her feet pressed against the dress that was dragging on the ground and the entire dress fell off his body, leaving him bare chested with his Spongebob boxers being the only thing on his body.
“MY GUCCI DRESS!” Cole yelled
“More like Hucci, what kinda dress rips into two pieces like that?” Vernon laughed
“help, protect me of gosh protect me!” Cole yelled dramatically and ran towards Luna
The girl snickered when Cole threw his body onto her lap, gasping dramaticly like a helpless little lady in the arms of a big strong man
“I have no idea what’s happening anymore” Jerry said and tossed his arms in the air in frustration
“Don’t worry Jerry, you can get it too” Cole smirked
“I… I have no idea what the means” Jerry said
Cole smirked and stood to his feet, strutting his way towards the elderly man who stood with his eyes wide open and clutched his mic to his chest.
Cole smiled and ran his hands over the man’s chest, Jerry’s cheek immediately burned red when Cole’s hands slowly dragged down his stomach and Cole reached to his knees-
“Cole, get your ass up here!” Dreama yelled, Cole chuckled and went over to the stage
“So what’s gonna happen here?” Jerry asked the three adults on stage
“Jerry, I have something to confess” Cole said
“Oh no” Luna snickered
“I thought it was over!” Cytheria laughed
“You thought WRONG” a male voice said, Cytheria’s eyes went wide as she looked over to Luna and saw that Lucifer was actually on a video call and watching the entire scene on stage
“Hi Lucifer” Cytheria chuckled
“Hello darling, nice to see you again but Shh, I’m trying to listen. This is getting good” Lucifer smirked
“What would you like to confess?” Jerry asked
Cole curled his finger around his ear as he pretend to push back his imaginary hair behind his ear, a red blush appeared on Cole’s face as he walked over towards Vernon
“Vernon” Cole said
“What” Vernon hissed
“I have something to tell you”
“Out with it” Vernon glared
“Remember that weird smell that came from the gear stick in your car?” Cole asked
“Yes?” Vernon said
“It was actually from my asshole-”
“you SON OF A BITCH” Vernon hissed and went over to attack the boy again
“Wait a second, wait a second. It says here that we have a surprise guest” Jerry said, Dreama and Cole furrowed their brows whole Vernon smirked
“Yes. I took the liberty to invite someone onto the stage, Abuela! Come on out!” Vernon yelled
Cole’s jaw dropped when his grandmother walked onto stage, the audience stood to their feet and screamed when the woman came onto the stage with a broom
The elderly woman swung her arm and lashed the broom against Cole’s back, the boy fell to the ground and screamed
“HOW. DARE. YOU. HAVE. SEX. WITH. YOUR. SISTER!” the woman yelled and swatted the broom against his legs
“wait, THIS WASN’T IN THE SCRIPT. DANIIIII” Cole screamed
“I know, but I love this so much right now” Vernon laughed
“OH MY GOD. GRANDMA WE WERE JUST ACTING” Dreama screamed and dashed off stage
“don’t you dare run, you’re next!” The grandmother yelled and ran backstage
“Grandma it was just a PRANK” Cole yelled and ran after the woman
“We’re all going to church, tonight!” The woman yelled
“I’m literally dying” Luna laughed and stomped her feet
“I can’t breatheee” Cytheria giggled
“Wait. Does that mean we have to go to church too?” Luna asked and Cytheria gave a small snicker
“We’ll burn and go see Lucifer”